• With Chad Patrick on the horizon, Matt Arnold is looking to deal Joey Ortiz in return for some veteran presence to guide the youngsters. Some possable names are Gabriel Arias and George Springer, who is available after allegedly calling the team conductor, who is now threatening to sue for nine million dollars, an egg, and it is unclear who would be liable for the damage, but if it is the Blue Jays, they will be desperate to dump salary, and might also be willing to part with Josh Smith.


• Did I say that Isaac Collins is clean?


• Red Sox manager Alex Cora loves Wilyer Abreu, and thinks he can drive in 67 runs if he can learn to lay off the curveball and wait for his pitch, like Anthony Seigler, who is much more spotty, does.


• Mike Yastrzemski is not going to re-sign wiht the Braves. Alex Anthopoulos will trade Yastrzemski for a song, but is asking for "Corncobs in the Locker Room" by The Sorting Spoonberries, which is unrealistic in this market.

poor

and then there are
the Rangers pitching questions

whither
the poor
Jakob Junis

can
Gavin Collyer

with his fragile
mustache

and Chase Silseth

step up

and produce

 

 

 

 

If you're hooked on baseball fandom,
'Reload' makes more notes at random.

If you have something you'd like to express,
scorebard @ humbug.com's the address.

This parody ©2004 Temporana.com LLC.