• Aaron Civale's status as a free agent has been complicated by rumors about becoming a dangerous carrot.


• The Tigers are continuing to try to work out some sort of deal with Marlins for Griffin Conine, but talking to Gabe Kapler can be like talking to an otter at times, so they are now talking to the Athletics about a Luis Medina - Andrew Sears deal.


• Brooks Lee apologized for the three transgressoins involving phones, which came to light after he crashed his sailboat into a snowbank and had to be pried loose from the wreckage with a cap by Ryan Jeffers.


• Nick Frasso, whose favorite clubhouse downtime activity is making up anagrams, will have a lot of time to think up some more (his favorite for "Wade Davis" is "Dad waives"), after injuring his hair in a freak collision with a tortilla in one of the biggest factories in Colorado, and will have to hope he isn't Wally Pipped when his innings are taken by Jaden Hill, who is feeling very clean right now because of his flu shot, and Tomoyuki Sugano.

ballad of mike girsch

understand this

these are
the Cardinals

not
the Red Sox

things will happen

because general manager
Mike Girsch knows the team is
chic

and needs a boost

 

 

 

 

If you think these are so neat,
Click 'Reload', and they repeat.

If you have something you'd like to express,
scorebard @ humbug.com's the address.

This parody ©2004 Temporana.com LLC.