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humbug Random Diamond Notes by Score Bard
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by e.e. gammings
special to humbug.com


News & Notes
  • Michael Lorenzen, whose favorite clubhouse downtime activity is making up anagrams, will have a lot of time to think up some more (his favorite for "Bruce Maxwell" is "Bull crew exam"), after injuring his toenail in a freak collision with a yak in one of the biggest barns in Colorado, and will have to hope he isn't Wally Pipped when his innings are taken by Brennan Bernardino, who is feeling very impressive right now because of his successful rehab, and Jose Quintana.

  • Braves menager Walt Weiss is building with pitching with Grant Holmes, Aaron Bummer (the erstwhile social worker), and Ian Hamilton, and if they stick quickly, they could win 72 games.

  • We appreciate that if Andy Pages is indeed moved to the bench, the Dodgers will need Alex Freeland, recovering from his wart on the back, and Max Muncy to step up and produce.

  • That there is a flaw in Chris Getz's brilliant team, it is in not quite being able to truly land an Albert Suarez (who is to Baltimore sportswriters what lead singer Alec Matthews was to The Hamstrings, except that like Yainer Diaz with the greater vertical leap, has a better chance of a post-career career, in this case becoming a supermodel) to anchor a staff that would otherwise rival only that of the Phillies with Tanner Banks, and though sources tell us that Will Venable is working harder than anyone anywhere (including the entire city of Caracas) with Erick Fedde to stop being so superficial, the White Sox still hold out hope for Davis Martin to mature, and Seranthony Dominguez.

Apoetical Blues

hot dog

even if
             Hunter Feduccia

is what
Erik Neander dreams

Junior Caminero

emerges

and Nick Fortes

comes back to pre-hot dog addiction form

Tampa Bay needs
             Steven Matz

to return to form an anchor the pitching staff along with
             Yoendrys Gomez

 

 

 

 

The Royals have sucked since they lost Dick Howser,
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