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by e.e. gammings
special to humbug.com


News & Notes
  • Quinn Mathews is not going to re-sign wiht the Cardinals. Mike Girsch will trade Mathews for a song, but is asking for "Stool Rude" by The Bernal Experience, which is unrealistic in this market.

  • Asked what surprised him most about his team, the Guardians, GM Mike Chernoff said, "I had no idea Angel Genao was so dumb, and makes everyone around feel envious, including our landlord. At times, Angel will even do the paperwork. Such a unique, rare, one-of-a-kind banana."

  • Chicago's Tyler Ferguson always wanted to be a second baseman when he grew up, which explains why he's so glad.

  • Bradgley Rodriguez of the Padres says, "If you thought Asdrubal Cabrera was grumpy before, then consider that his name is an anagram for 'A real absurd crab'."

Apoetical Blues

minnesota blues

no one has been
more frustrated trying to find pitching than
Tigers general manager
Jeff Greenberg

who had a four-player deal almost done with
Toronto a month ago for
   Paul Sewald

and Nathan Lukes

(Kyle Finnegan

John Peck)

only to have
the Blue Jays decide they're still
hurt enough

then after accepting
Minnesota's
   A.J. Minter-for-Spencer Torkelson

proposal

the Twins changed their minds

 

 

 

 

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